Justin Therouxs skinny jeans at LAX: unflattering for his disproportionate body?

Publish date: 2024-06-04

These are new photos of Justin Theroux arriving at LAX, having just flown in from New York City. His lover Jennifer Aniston is still filming in North Carolina. I really, really wonder why he’s not at her side. And yes, Pity Party Patrol, I KNOW that couples don’t have to be joined at the hip forever and ever. I’m just saying – JustJen really are joined at the hip normally, and it feels like they haven’t been together in a week, which is longer than they seem to go without seeing each other usually. Take that with the fact that Justin seemed to be living his old Heidi-Bivens life in NY and hanging out with his hipster bachelor buddies like Uncle Terry Richardson… it’s weird. It’s probably nothing. But I do like to analyze every little detail.

It wasn’t until I saw Justin Theroux in motion on Ellen DeGeneres’s show that I realized what a strange body he has. Not “strange” as in “he’s a freak of nature!” – more like “strange” as in “how did I never notice how small he is in general, and how he has really short legs?” You know why I never noticed? It’s because his top half is decent – he has nice arms, a decent build above the waist, and a big head (literally!). But his bottom half is disproportional. And it’s not being helped by his insistence on wearing these weird skinny jeans and too-tight, close-cut leather pants and whatever the BIEBER HELL he’s wearing in these photos (skinny sweatpants?). I like that Justin owns his slim (disproportionate) body, but I’ve got to ask – isn’t there a way for him to wear nice, flattering pants? He’s 40 years old. He should be able to find a good pair of pants by now.

Also – that’s HIS Louis Vuitton bag. The Asian(?) man is his driver, I think, and that’s why the dude is carrying Justin’s precious LV bag. I’m also including a photo of the back of Justin’s head – WHAT HAPPENED TO HIS BALD SPOT?!? Is that a hipster comb-over or did he get some plugs?

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet.

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